Residing at Govardhana in Kãrtika

A thousand devotees gathered for Śrīla Gurudeva’s darśana upon his arrival at Śrī Giridhārī Gauḍīya Maṭha. During the remainder of his stay in Govardhana, his health fluctuated from day to day and he remained in internal consciousness (antara-daśā) most of the time.

Manifesting Transcendental Emotions

From time to time, Śrīla Gurudeva would manifest some of the symptoms of ecstasy mentioned by Śrīla Rūpa Gosvāmī in Bhakti-rasāmṛta-sindhu. Sometimes incessant tears would flow from his eyes, sometimes froth would issue from his lotus mouth, and sometimes he would hiccup continually for hours on end. Occasionally, as if in forgetfulness, he would ask, “Where am I?” or “Is it day or night?” Like Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu asked Śrī Svarūpa Dāmodara and Rāya Rāmānanda Prabhu, "Where Am I? Who am I?" and sometimes he did not recall the names of even his closest sevakas. When Śrīla Gurudeva forgot the name of Śrīla Brajanātha Prabhu in Govardhana, Śrīla Gurudeva asked, "Call the devotee?" His personal sevaka asked, "To whom I may call? Gurudeva replied, "The very tall figure western devotee who always travels with me." The sevaka asked, "Brajanātha Prabhu?" He replied, "Yes, yes, call Brajanātha." But Śrīla Gurudeva never forgot my name, Mādhava Mahārāja. Yet at other times, he would exhibit his razor-sharp acuity and catch a sevaka’s faulty pronunciation of devotees’ names, correcting him by properly pronouncing them himself.

Sometimes, upon seeing the service attitude of the devotees attending him, he would express his appreciation of them, and at other times, he would correct them and tell them how to perform their service. Sometimes he would awaken from sleep and ask, “The parikramā has gone to Nandagāon today?” or, “It is Ekādaśī today?” This always astonished those serving him, as they had not given him any information as to what day it was, yet Śrīla Gurudeva had accurate knowledge of what was happening.

Although it was of utmost importance to those attending Śrīla Gurudeva to see to his dietary needs according to the doctor’s instructions, still, he would sometimes inquire, “Will you not give me anything to eat today?” Needless to say, it was with great pleasure that they would immediately offer something to him.

Arranging for Darśana of Śrīla Gurudeva

A particular predicament arose during Śrīla Gurudeva’s stay at Govardhana: How could darśana be arranged for all the devotees who had come for parikramā from India and abroad? It was not possible to allow everyone inside Śrīla Gurudeva’s bhajana-kutīra, but the devotees were disconsolate that they could not take his darśana. Initially, a system was put in place of allowing devotees to cue up for darśana through the side-window. But this did not prove to be successful; the line did not flow smoothly and more often, did not even move at all.

Everyone was bewildered as to how to deal with the situation, until finally, Ramacandra prabhu made a wonderful suggestion: “Why not put a large LCD screen in the temple room? That way, all the devotees can easily take Śrīla Gurudeva’s darśana at the same time.” This proposal was happily welcomed by all, and an LCD screen was quickly arranged. Now the devotees in the temple could have darśana of Śrīla Gurudeva in his bhajana-kutīra. A small television screen was also placed in his bhajanakutīra so he could also see them.

When Śrīla Gurudeva was not able to see the sannyāsīs on his screen (because they were on stage, out of camera range), he would inquire, “Where are the sannyāsīs? I cannot see them.” The sannyāsīs happily honoured his request and assembled before the camera. Seeing all the devotees taking his darśana from the temple room, Śrīla Gurudeva would raise his hand to bless them. Sometimes, when he was absorbed internally, even though his mere presence or glance gave all blessings, his sevakas would try to draw him into external consciousness to interact with the devotees.

These darśanas filled the devotees with great bliss and they would loudly chant, “Jaya Śrīla Gurudeva!” or “Gurudeva, tumhārī jaya jaya ho!” Sometimes they would sing “Govinda Dāmodara Mādhaveti,” while at other times, the Hare Kṛṣṇa mahā-mantra to the ‘Australian tune’. Singing and chanting in this way, the devotees would often become overwhelmed and begin to weep. For the duration of Śrīla Gurudeva’s darśana, no one would move from their places but would simply stare at the screen with unblinking eyes, oblivious to all else. One midnight, Śrīla Gurudeva suddenly woke up and continuously insisted his sevakas to take him to Vṛndavana dhāma. The present sevakas couldn't tackle the matter. They informed me (Śrīpada Mādhava Mahārāja) that Gurudeva is calling you. He is insisting to take him to Vṛndavana dhāma. We couldn't satisfy him so we have come to call you. Śrīla Gurudeva is only calling you for this reason. By causeless mercy of Śrīla Gurudeva, I know the tricks how to satisfy and console my lala (Śrīla Gurudeva). Seeing me Gurudeva told, "Mādhava Mahārāja I want to go to Vṛndavana." I replied, "Yes, we will arrange. It is midnight now. Tomorrow morning we will go. In the meantime I am doing necessary arrangement." Gurudeva replied, "Yes, very good."

The Predicament of Śrīla Gurudeva’s Sevakas

Although Śrīla Gurudeva’s darśana on the LCD screen was well appreciated, how could it compare with directly seeing him, even if only for a moment? Gradually, devotees began to press for this. “Please make some arrangements for direct darśana of Śrīla Gurudeva,” they requested. “Taking his darśana on the screen does not compare with this.” His personal sevakas endeavoured to accommodate the devotees as far as they could, but they were in a painful quandary. How could they possibly ensure Śrīla Gurudeva’s personal needs and also satisfy everyone?

They next tried to implement a system of allowing devotees to silently have darśana from the window while Śrīla Gurudeva was sleeping, but once he unexpectedly woke up and instructed his sevakas to close the curtains fully, without so much as a little opening in them. “I do not want anyone to be upset by seeing me in this condition,” he told them. The sevakas had no choice but to comply with Śrīla Gurudeva’s request, and so had to perform their duties in a dimly lit room throughout the day.

The Intense Desire of the Devotees for Direct Darśana

Seeing Śrīla Gurudeva’s deep internal absorption, his sevakas carefully served him in that state, but on occasion, out of concern for his health, they would gently awaken him to external consciousness and attempt to bring him out of the room, saying, “O Śrīla Gurudeva, the doctors suggest that you come out of the room for at least a few minutes and that you sit in the fresh air and meet with the devotees.”

Words cannot describe the condition of the devotees or the enthusiasm and joy that filled their hearts when they saw Śrīla Gurudeva come to the open door in his wheelchair, or even sometimes walk there, his hands on the shoulders of devotees on either side of him. On these occasions, he would give his darśana for a few minutes. From windows, from the roof, from the garden, from the balcony, even hanging from pillars or however they could, the devotees would position themselves so as to receive darśana of Śrīla Gurudeva, as if wanting to record these moments in their hearts forever. Some devotees offered āratī to Śrīla Gurudeva with ghee lamps, while others were content to perform āratī with their eyes. Wherever Śrīla Gurudeva turned to look, the devotees standing in that direction would consider themselves most blessed. He gave darśana like this for two or three days, after which he again entered full internal consciousness.

The Vraja-maṇḍala Parikramā Performed by Śrīla Gurudeva

At this time, Śrīla Gurudeva performed an amazing līlā for about three days. He was constantly immersed in some type of deep ecstatic emotion. However, one day, he repeatedly urged his personal sevakas, “Take me to Vṛndāvana. I want to perform Vraja-maṇḍala parikramā.” The sevakas tried to pacify him by informing him that all the devotees were now at Govardhana, having arrived there from Vṛndāvana, and he was in fact with the parikramā party. Still he continued to insist that they must take him to Vṛndāvana. They concluded that for him to insist upon this, he must have a confidential reason, so they told him, “Yes, Gurudeva, we will arrange for you to go to Vṛndāvana.” Upon hearing this, he became satisfied and rested for some time.

Sometime in the evening he would say, “Oh, today the parikramā will go to Śrī Rādhā-Dāmodara Mandira, Sevā-kuñja, Śrī Rādhā-Śyāmsundara Mandira and other nearby places. I cannot go to them all, but I will certainly go to Sevā-kuñja and Śrī Rādhā-Dāmodara.” Or, “Today the parikramā is going to Māna-sarovara.” It was as if he were directly in Vṛndāvana, performing Vraja-maṇḍala parikramā.

Upon rising the next morning, Śrīla Gurudeva exclaimed, “Oh, this Paiṅṭhāgaon is so beautiful! Śrī Rādhājī’s special glories (vaiśiṣṭya) were established here.” It seemed that in his deep ecstatic state, in just one day he had completed the twelve-day parikramā that is performed from Vṛndāvana, and had now reached Govardhana.

Śrīla Gurudeva then began to say “I must visit Dāna Ghāṭī, the festival at the bank of Surabhi-kuṇḍa, Rādhā-kuṇḍa, Śyāma-kuṇḍa and the other pastime places.” Some time later he said, “Today the parikramā is going to Nandagāon and Varsānā. We will also go to Ṭer Kadamba, Uddhava-kyārī and Ūñcāgaon.” In this way, also within a day, he completed the eighteenday parikramā that is normally performed from Govardhana.

Every year, immediately after parikramā, Śrīla Gurudeva would hold programs in Delhi and go to the dentist. Having thus completed Vrajamaṇḍala parikramā, the next morning he said to his personal sevaka, Śrīpada Mādhava Mahārāja, “Inform my dentist in Delhi that we are coming there, and request him to be ready because in the evening we have the celebration at Śrī Ramaṇa-Bihārī Gauḍīya Maṭha. It is essential that we reach the maṭha in time.” Wanting to support Śrīla Gurudeva’s inner mood, although not knowing the reality of that mood, the sevaka replied, “Yes, I will contact him.”

Later as the sevaka assisted him in brushing his teeth, Śrīla Gurudeva asked him for the dental floss and when he could not find it, Śrīla Gurudeva concluded, “It must have been packed with everything else in the car going to Delhi. If you find it easily, bring it; otherwise just leave it and in Delhi we will see what to do.”

Thus Śrīla Gurudeva revealed his personal Vraja-maṇḍala parikramā- līlā, leaving his sevakas astonished and grateful to have had a glimpse of his internal moods.

The arrival of Śrīla Bhaktivedānta Vāmana Gosvāmī Mahārāja’s auspicious disappearance day

Some years before, Śrīla Gurudeva had stated, “Following in the footsteps of my senior Godbrother prapūjya-caraṇa Śrīmad Bhaktivedānta Vāmana Mahārāja, I want to take shelter of the same tithī (exact day) to leave this world.” These words caused much apprehension in the hearts of all, and as the disappearance day of Śrīla Bhaktivedānta Vāmana Gosvāmī Mahārāja approached, the devotees began to be increasingly anxious that his words might come to pass. In a most earnest attempt to prevent this, almost all the devotees who had come to Śrī Vraja-maṇḍala parikramā and also devotees all over the world began to pray intensely to Śrī Girirāja Govardhana, who fulfils all desires. Many stayed awake the whole night performing harināma-saṅkīrtana, some sang stava-stuti, while some performed abhiśekha of Girirāja and others circumambulated Girirāja. To the devotees’ great relief, though, in the morning it was reported that Śrīla Gurudeva had slept peacefully that night.

Śrīla Gurudeva’s Merciful Instructions on the Occasion of the Release of the Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam

During Kārtika, the first volume of Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam’s Tenth Canto, Chapters 1–8, translated by Śrīpad Bhaktivedānta Tīrtha Mahārāja and edited by Śrīla Gurudeva, was published. Śrīpad Tīrtha Mahārāja presented the book to Śrīla Gurudeva, who joyfully received it and released it for distribution. At that time, he gave valuable instructions to Śrīpad Bhaktivedānta Tīrtha Mahārāja that are pertinent to all his followers:

“When, by my Gurudeva’s order, I translated Śrīla Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura’s Jaiva-dharma into Hindi, I cited Guru Mahārāja as the editor. In the Introduction, Gurudeva wrote, ‘Only because I am the object of the devotees’ honour has my name been mentioned as the editor of this book, but actually it is the translator and publisher of this Hindi Jaiva-dharma, tridaṇḍi-svāmī Śrī Śrī Bhaktivedānta Nārāyaṇa Mahārāja, who has indeed accomplished all the functions of the editor and has thus become the object of my special blessings.’

“Although externally I did all the labour to produce this book, which is why Śrīla Guru Mahārāja wrote to that effect, still in my heart I always maintained the conception that the writing was accomplished by Guru Mahārāja only. In the same way, you should never think that it is you who are translating these sacred granthas. Rather, always think that Śrīla Gurudeva has accomplished this book through you for the welfare of the whole world, and that for the auspiciousness of the world, he has sprinkled the rain drops of this transcendental message like a shower of flowers. Śrīla Gurudeva continued, "You should not think you are a doer, you are only an instrument in the hand of Gurudeva."

“I have almost finished fifty-two chapters of the Tenth Canto. Now complete the Tenth Canto according to our Gauḍīya conception, as you have done here, fully crediting our guru-varga (aśraya-vigraha) for your efforts and always keeping them in the forefront.”

The devotees were overwhelmed to hear his words, full of mercy and blessings.

Offering New Publications to Śrīla Gurudeva

During that period, Śrīpad Viṣṇu-daivata Mahārāja, Mañjarī dāsī and Kṛṣṇa-prema dāsa also offered Śrīla Gurudeva the English translation of the second volume of Śrī Bṛhad-bhāgavatāmṛta, and the Rays of The Harmonist team offered the Kārtika 2010 edition of into his lotus hands. The Hindi publication of Four Rūpanuga Vaiṣṇava Ācāryas, compiled, translated and edited by Śrīla Gurudeva, was also offered to him. Śrīpad Mādhava Mahārāja offered the English hagiography he has written, entitled, Śrīla Gurudeva: The Supreme Treasure and Veṇu-gopāla dāsa offered a graphic novel I Am Spirit. Śrīla Gurudeva was most pleased and blessed all the devotees who were involved in the publication of these books.

Śrīla Gurudeva’s Auspicious desire

One day, Śrīla Gurudeva said to some of the devotees working on the Hindi publications, “When I leave, continue publishing our books just as they are being printed now. The cycle of progress in publishing our scriptures should never be broken. Whatever books are out of stock should be reprinted immediately.”

Śrīla Gurudeva–The Supreme Treasure

Śrīpada Mādhava Mahārāja offered the first volume of his second Phd Thesis during Kartika at Govardhana. Later on, Śrīla Gurudeva moved to Jagannath Puri in JayaŚrī Dāmodara Gaudiya Math. The printer sent the final copies to Mādhava Mahārāja. Along with other devotees, headed by Mādhava-priya Prabhu and Siddhanti Mahārāja, Śrīpada Mādhava Mahārāja offered the final copy of the First Volume of Śrīla Gurudeva's biography, nicely binded in blue and orange color cloth. Śrīla Gurudeva asked his personal sevaka, "How many volumes will you do?" Śrīpada Mādhava Mahārāja replied, "Between 4-5 volumes." Gurudeva asked again, "Will you be able to do so many volumes?" Mahārāja replied, "Yes Gurudeva, by your causeless mercy, I can do even more. I have collected from your classes so much material from beginning of 80's." Gurudeva became very happy and placed both his lotus hands on my head, "Yes, you can do that. My heartly blessings to you. In future, my biography will be like a lightpost for devotees around the world. What you have showed me in Cebu, Phillipinnes, before submitting your thesis before the university, all that matter will be there without any change?" Śrīpada Mādhava Mahārāja replied, "Yes Gurudeva, that was a condensed form. It will be expanded very nicely." Gurudeva told, "Yes, go ahead, again my heartly blessings to you."

Various Vaiṣṇavas Arrive for the Darśana of Śrīla Gurudeva

There was a constant flow of ācāryas and Vaiṣṇavas from different Sārasvata Gauḍīya maṭhas and different sampradāyas to the Giridhārī Gauḍīya Maṭha to honour Śrīla Gurudeva. It is impossible to name them all, but they include: from Vinoda-vāṇī Gauḍīya Maṭha in Vṛndāvana, Śrīpad Bhakti Vikaśa Govinda Mahārāja; from Govardhana Gauḍīya Maṭha, Śrīpad Govardhana dāsa Bābājī; from Śrī Rūpānuga Bhajana Āśrama at Rādhā-kuṇḍa, Śrīpad Bhakti Sarvasva Govinda Mahārāja and Śrīpad Mathurānātha dāsa Bābājī Mahārāja; the present ācārya of Śrī Kṛṣṇa Caitanya Maṭha in Vardhamāna, Śrīmad Bhakti Jīvana Ācārya Mahārāja; from Śrī Bhajana-kuṭī in Vṛndāvana, Śrīmad Gopānanda Vana Mahārāja; the ācārya of Śrī Caitanya Maṭha, pūjyapāda Śrīmad Bhakti Prajñāna Yati Mahārāja, along with Śrīmad Bhakti Sudhīra Dāmodara Mahārāja; from Śrī Gopīnātha Gauḍīya Maṭha, Śrīpad Bhakti Śaraṇa Dāmodara Mahārāja; from ISKCON, Śrīpad Mahanidhi Mahārāja, ISKCON Vṛndāvana’s Temple President, Śrī Pañca-Gauda Prabhu and his wife Śrīmatī Gaura Pūrṇimā dāsī, Vice-President Śrī Janārdana Brahmacārī, and Śrī Śruta-kīrti Prabhu; from Śrī Vṛnda-kuñja, Śrīpad Paramadvaiti Mahārāja; Śrī Śrīmad Bhakti Jīvana Janārdana Gosvāmī Mahārāja’s disciple Śrīpad Govinda Mahārāja; many sannyāsī disciples of Śrī Śrīmad Bhakti Vaibhava Purī Gosvāmī Mahārāja; and several other devotees. Besides these, from Māna-garha (Varsānā), Śrī Ramesh Bābā; Sanskrit paṇḍita Śrī Viṣṇu Pandey of Mathurā and Śrī Shyamdas of Jatīpurā; followers of the puṣṭi-mārga, as well as other Vaiṣṇava saints also came to have his darśana.

Seeing the great efforts of his sevakas, Śrīla Gurudeva became concerned.

Seeing that the devotees were serving him day and night, one day, Śrīla Gurudeva said, “I do not want to live in this world any longer.” “Please, why are you speaking like this?” they asked him.

“It is because of me that so many devotees are being troubled,” he said.

“Gurudeva,” they responded, “we experience no trouble in serving you. In fact, being able to render you just a little service is our greatest fortune. We only beg that you please forgive our shortcomings.”

Despite his debilitated physical condition, it was Śrīla Gurudeva who was concerned for us, worrying that we were the ones who were troubled.

Gurudeva’s Words of Benediction at the End of Kārtika

While in Govardhana, Śrīla Gurudeva’s health very slowly improved, much to the joy of the devotees. On the full-moon day at the end of Kārtika, he came out of his bhajana-kutīra in a wheel-chair and spoke to all the devotees assembled there: “Just as you have come to participate in this year’s Vraja-maṇḍala parikramā, you should all come every year. Within a few months, Śrī Navadvīpa-dhāma parikramā will also take place, and all of you must also participate in that parikramā. I will meet all of you there.” These encouraging words caused the devotees to resoundingly chant “Jaya Gurudeva, Jaya Gurudeva!” their throats choked with happiness.