Chapter 13 - Hanuman’s Dilemma

Descending on to the ramparts from the aerial car, that leader of monkeys, the agile Hanuman, resembled a flash of lightning athwart the clouds and, having searched the apartments of Ravana without finding Sita, Videha’s daughter, he said to himself:—

“Seeking the object of Rama’s affection, I have explored Lanka again and again without finding the daughter of Janaka of immaculate form! Many times have the marshes, pools, lakes, streams, rivers, banks, forests and inaccessible mountains been scoured by me without any trace of Sita being found!

“The King of the Vultures, Sampati, affirmed that Sita was in Ravana’s palace but I do not see her there, how can this be? Or has the daughter of Videha, Maithili, born of Janaka, who was carried away against her will, being wholly helpless surrendered to Ravana? Or perchance, fearing Rama’s arrows, in his rapid flight, that titan has allowed Sita to slip from his grasp or she seeing herself borne away on the path of the Siddhas and beholding the ocean, has yielded up her life? Who can say whether that noble large-eyed lady has not succumbed on account of the great speed assumed by Ravana and the pressure of his arms?

“It may happen that, while Ravana flew over the sea, the daughter of Janaka struggling to free herself, fell into the waves, or alas, far from her lord, seeking to defend her honour, was devoured by that vile Ravana. May not that innocent dark-eyed lady have become the food of those impure consorts of that Indra of demons? Ever absorbed in the contemplation of Rama, whose countenance resembles the moon, has she breathed her last, bewailing her lot and crying: ‘O Rama! O Lakshmana! O Ayodhya!’, or, having been banished to the dungeons of Ravana’s palace, is that youthful woman grieving like a caged bird? How could the slender-waisted consort of Rama, born of the blood of Janaka, possessing eyes like lotus petals, submit to Ravana? But whether she be slain or is lost or has died, I dare not speak of it to Rama. To tell him would be an offence, yet it is also wrong to withhold it from him; what should I do? I am perplexed 1 In such a dilemna, how shall I act?”

Thus thinking, Hanuman added:—“If, without finding Sita, I return to the city of that lord among monkeys, in how far will my courage have availed me? My crossing of the ocean has come to nought as also my entry into Lanka and my survey of the titans. When I come to Kishkindha, what will Sugriva and the assembled monkeys say to me or those twin sons of Dasaratha? If I approach Kakutstha with these fatal tidings saying: ‘I have not found Sita’, he will give up his life. Hearing these cruel, terrible, heartrending and barbarous words, he will not survive and, when his mind has been withdrawn into the five elements, the sagacious Lakshmana, deeply attached to Rama, will also cease to exist! Then, hearing that his two brothers are dead, Bharata will yield up his life and Shatrughna will renounce his existence also. Beholding their sons dead, their mothers, Kaushalya, Sumitra and Kaikeyi will undoubtedly surrender their lives and, seeing Rama’s plight, his grateful and loyal friend, Sugriva, will give up his fife. Then the grief-stricken Ruma, distracted and crushed with sorrow, will perish on account of her lord and the Queen Tara, already inconsolable on account of Bali’s end, worn out by suffering will be unable to continue living. The loss of his parents will lead the youthful Angada to the brink of death and, overwhelmed by the passing of their leader, the inhabitants of the woods having been cherished with gentleness, gifts and regard by their illustrious monarch, will strike their heads with their fists and die.

“Thenceforth, those foremost of monkeys will no longer assemble to disport themselves in the woods, among the rocks and caves, but with their sons, wives and servants, in despair on account of their master’s death, will hurl themselves from the height of the rocks into the abysses and chasms. And they will take poison or hang themselves or enter the fire or fast to death or fall on their own weapons. It is certain that a great calamity will follow my return and the House of Ikshvaku and the inhabitants of the forests will meet with destruction.

“But, if I do not return, those two virtuous and great carwarriors as also the swift-footed monkeys will continue to live in the hope of receiving tidings of Sita, and I, not having found Sita, shall exist by that which falls to my lot, living a life of privation and subsisting on fruit and roots in die forest.

“Preparing a funeral pyre on the shores of the sea, in a place abounding in roots, fruits and water, I shall enter the flames or allow myself to die of hunger and, without fail, offer my emaciated frame as food for the birds and beasts of prey. In my belief, this is the death the sages envisaged for themselves; either I must find Janaki or enter the sea.

“My bright garland of glory, so nobly plaited and begot of courageous acts has perished because I have not been able to find Sita. I shall therefore become an ascetic living under the trees but return I will not without having seen that darkeyed damsel. If I go back without finding Sita, neither Angada nor the other monkeys will survive. Yet incalculable ills lie in store for one taking his own life; if however I continue to live, I may achieve success, therefore I shall maintain my existence I If I live, the re-union of Rama and Sita may be effected.”

Revolving these innumerable and painful considerations in his mind, that lion among monkeys sought to prevent himself from being overcome by despair. Summoning up all his courage, that mighty monkey said to himself:—

“I shall slay Dashagriva the terrible Ravana and thus avenge the abduction of Sita or, crossing the sea, I shall drag him before Rama as a beast is offered up to Pashupati.”

Reflecting thus, that monkey, who was filled with anxiety and grief, not having been able to find Sita, thought: “So long as I do not find the illustrious consort of Rama, I shall not cease from searching the city of Lanka on every side. If, according to Sampati’s words, I bring Rama hither, Raghava, not beholding his consort, will burn all the monkeys with the fire of his wrath. Therefore I shall stay here, living a life of abstinence with my senses under control lest all men and monkeys perish through my fault.

“Here is a great Ashoka grove, containing huge trees, which has not yet been searched by me. Having paid reverence to the Vasus, the Rudras, the Adityas, the Ashvins and the Maruts, in order to increase the torment of the titans, I shall enter it. Having vanquished the demons, I shall restore the divine Sita, the delight of the House of Ikshvaku to Rama as the fruit of austerity is bestowed on an ascetic.”

Having thus reflected for a space, the mighty offspring of the Wind-god suddenly rose and said: “Salutations to Rama accompanied by Lakshmana and Anila! Salutations to Candra, Agni and the Maruts 1”

After paying obeisance to all the Gods as also to Sugriva, the offspring of the Wind-god, surveying the four quarters, in imagination as it were advanced towards that magnificent grove and began to consider what should be done further.

He reflected: “This Ashoka Grove which is sacred with its dense thickets must be filled with titans, its trees are surely protected by trained guards and the blessed Vishvatam himself refrains from blowing vigorously here. In Rama’s interests I shall contract my form so that I may not be detected by Ravana. May all the Gods, as also the hosts of sages, confer success on me! May Svyambhu, the Celestial Beings, as also the ascetics, the God of Fire, the God of the Wind, the Bearer of the Thunderbolt, Varuna, the Moon and the Sun, the high-souled Ashvins and all the Maruts grant me success! May all beings and the Lord of all Beings and those unknown, who are met with on the way, confer success on me!

“When shall I behold that noble and irreproachable queen with her arched nose, pearly teeth, sweet smile and eyes resembling lotus petals, bright as the King of the Stars, O when?

“O how will that frail and virtuous one, ruthlessly borne away by that wicked and vile wretch, the scourge of human beings, who masks his savagery under an alluring disguise, disclose herself to me?”