Song 33

(Varāḍi rāga-Dhūlā khelā-jāta, Karuṇā-chanda)

1. In this way Śacī spoke her heart. Her heart was sorrowful. Her face was withered. No words came to her mouth. From her two eyes tears streamed. Seeing her, Viṣṇupriyā fell unconscious.

2. Viṣṇupriyā spoke no nectar-sweet words. Her heart was agitated. From the peoples mouths she had heard whispered rumors. From hints she could understand the truth. It was as if she was struck by a thunderbolt. Poor Viṣṇupriyā fell unconscious.

3. Viṣṇupriyā thought in her heart. At the day’s end Lord Gaura cheerfully returned home. He ate and drank. Then He lay down on His bed. Viṣṇupriyā quickly approached Him.

4. Touching His lotus feet, she sighed. Her face anxious, she gazed at Him. Wrapping the vines of her arms around the feet of her master more dear than life, she pressed those feet to her heart.

5. Tears from her eyes soaked her bodice. The flooding streams of her tears washed the Lord’s feet. Lord Gaura suddenly awakened. He asked Viṣṇupriyā what she was doing.

6. "You are most dear, most dear to Me. Why do you weep? O goddess, please tell.", He said. He placed her on His lap. He placed His right hand on her chin. With sweet words again He asked His question.

7. Goddess Viṣṇupriyā wept. Her heart was broken. She spoke not a word. The life breath in her heart was filled with suffering. She felt no longer could she stay in her body. Tears streamed from her eyes.

8. Again and again Lord Gaura asked, but saintlyhearted Viṣṇupriyā never answered. She only held His feet and wept. Lord Gaura knows every art. With the cloth from His own body He wiped her tears. Then He asked some questions.

9. Speaking of how They could enjoy many pastimes, He made the love within her grow. His words could make a stone burst into flowers. Seeing how eager Lord Gaura was to enjoy with her, moonfaced Viṣṇupriyā spoke some words in a voice choked with emotion.

10. She said: "Please listen. Listen, O master of my life. Please place Your hand on my head. Will You not accept sannyāsa? This I heard from the peoples mouths. Now my heart is broken. I will enter fire.

11. "My life, wealth, beauty, youth, garments, grace, playfulness, love, and skill are meant only to please You. If You leave me, what will I, worthless like a pile of ashes, do? My heart will burn in flames of poison.

12. "Let my body perish. I have only this to say: How will You walk on the pathways? Your feet are soft like śirīṣa flowers. I fear even to touch them with my hand.

13. "When You stumble and fall like a stick to the ground, my life breath trembles and streams of tears flood my limbs. How will You place Your reddish feet on the bramble-filled forest paths?

14. "When You do even the slightest action, I see drops and drops of perspiration on the moon of Your face. The monsoon will come. Some days rain will come. Other days the sun will shine. In sannyāsa the sufferings are great.

15. "I know nothing but Your feet. Why do You throw me away? Why do You not fear to break the rules of religion? Why will You leave Your elderly mother Śacī, who is already halfway to her death?

16. "Why will You accept sannyāsa? Why will You leave Murāri, Mukunda Datta, Śrīvāsa, Haridāsa, Advaita Acārya, and all the other devotees?

17. "You are filled with love. You live in everyone’s heart. Still, Your actions are very troublesome. When they hear You have gone to a faraway country, Murārī and all the devotees will perish.

18. "What will I do? I am worthless like a pile of ashes. I am the material attachment You wish to renounce. It is because of me that You wish to accept sannyāsa. That is my fear. Very well, I will take one last look at You, and then I will swallow poison. Then You may happily live in Your own home.

19. "O master, please don’t go to another country. There is no one but You in my world. My heart is on fire to gaze at Your face." Viṣṇupriyā had no power to say any more words. Her heart was filled with sorrow. She only grasped Lord Gaura’s feet and wept.

20. Hearing Viṣṇupriyā’s words, Lord Gaura smiled, picked her up, and placed her on His lap. With His garment He wiped the tears from her face. He joked with her in many ways. "Don’t be unhappy for no reason.", He said.

21. "Who said I would leave you and accept sannyāsa? Whatever I do will tell you. Don’t perish with this needless sorrow."

22. After saying these words, Lord Gaura-Harī kissed and embraced her. With her He enjoyed many wonderful nectar pastimes. With limitless loving pastimes, with pastimes at the highest point of all grace and beauty, He satisfied Viṣṇupriyā.

23. With blissful nectar pastimesa They passed the night. Flames again rose in Viṣṇupriyā’s heart. Gazing at the face of hre beloved more dear than life, again she questioned Him.

24. Placing her Lord’s hand on her breast, Goddess Viṣṇupriyā asked: "Please don’t lie to me. Tell me the truth. Will You leave me?

25. "You asre the supreme master. You will do whatever You like. You are never controlled by anyone. You will do whatever You wish. If You wish to accept sannyāsa, what can I say to stop You? Please tell the truth to me."

26. Hearing thewse words, the Lord gently smiled and said: "Please listen, O dearest beloved. What I say is for your benefit. Please listen carefully.

27. "Whatever you see in this world is an illusion. Only the Supreme Personality of Godhead and the Vaiṣṇavas are real. Please know that everything else is an illsuion.

28. "Children, husband, wife, father, and mother are all illusions. They are all temporary. Who has a relationship with whom? Lord Kṛṣṇa’s feet are our only family. We have no other family in truth. Please see all other family as the illusions of Māyā.

29. "Who is a husband and who a wife? Both are spirit souls. Their relationship is false. it is only the shackles of material illusion. Lord Kṛṣṇa is the hsuband of all. All are His wives. This truth no one knows.

30. "Seed and egg join, and then an infant is born from the place where urine flows. Filled with ignorance, the infant falls to the ground. That infant grows to become a child, then a youth, and then elder. He suffers many troubles. Still, he is very proud of his body and his home.

31. "For so long he maintained his family, but in his old age his family only insults him. In old age he has no honor. Gradually he grows blind and deaf. Despondent, he weeps. He never worshiped Lord Kṛṣṇa.

32. "He accepted a human body in this world of birth and death to have an opportunity to worship Lord Kṛṣṇa. But, bound by māyā’s shackles, he forgets his true purpose. Intoxicated with pride, he forgets his teue master. At the end he dies and goes to hell.

33. "Your name is Viṣṇupriyā (She who is dear to Lord Viṣṇu). Now please make that an appropriate name for you. Please don’t needlessly lament in your heart. This I tell to you: Throw your worries far away and dedicate your body and mind to serving Lord Kṛṣṇa."

34. Then Lord Gaura manifested His power as the Supreme Personality of Godhead. He threw his illusory potency māyā far away. He made Viṣṇupriyā joyful at heart. Her suffering and lamentation fled far away. Her heart was filled with bliss. Suddenly she saw four-armed Lord Viṣṇu standing before her.

35. Even though she saw four-armed Lord Viṣṇu before her, Goddess Viṣṇupriyā naver abandoned the idea that Lord Gaura was her husband. Falling down before the Lord’s feet, she said: "O Lord, please hear the one request I place before You.

36. "I, a person worthless like a pile of ahses, have taken birth in this world of birth and death. You are the dear master of my life. You are my great treasure. I am Your maidservant. Why, then, do I feel like I am falling down into hell?"

37. Speaking these words, sorrowing Viṣṇupriyā wept. She was wild with grief. Seeing His dear dear devotee’s distress, Lord Gaura also wept, the tears flowing from His eyes. Then He embraced her and gave her His mercy.

38. He said: "Please hear, O Goddess Viṣṇupriyā. I will tell you what is in My heart. Whenever you think of Me, I will come before you. I solemnly tell you this is the truth. It is the truth."

39. Hearing Lord Kṛṣṇa’s promise, Viṣṇupriyā thought for a moment and said: "You are the independent Supreme Lord. You will do whatever You wish. What power have I to stop You? I will never say anything to stop You."

40. Viṣṇupriyā bowed her head. Tears flowed from her eyes. Gazing at her, the Lord spoke sweet words. Listening to Lord Gaura’s words and deeds, sorrowing Locana dāsa sings this song.