Verse 2.2.28

Sanskrit text, Unicode transliteration, Word-for-word and English translation of verse 2.2.28:

अत्यजंश् च जपं स्वीयम् अकृतज्ञत्व-शङ्कया ।
विस्मर्तुं नैव शक्नोमि व्रज-भूमिम् इमां क्वचित् ॥ २८ ॥

atyajaṃś ca japaṃ svīyam akṛtajñatva-śaṅkayā |
vismartuṃ naiva śaknomi vraja-bhūmim imāṃ kvacit || 28 ||

atyajan–not giving up; ca–also; japam–the chanting; svīyam–own (mantra); akṛta-jñatva–of being ungrateful; śaṅkayā–out of fear; vismartum–to forget; na–not; eva–indeed; śaknomi–I can; vrajabhūmim–the land of Vraja; imām–this; kvacit–ever.

As a result of chanting my mantra, I obtained direct darśana of Śrī Viṣṇu and the kingdom of heaven. But, even then, I did not give up chanting my mantra. To do so would have been gross ingratitude on my part. And even though I was staying in Nanda-kānana, I could not forget my sweet memories of Vraja.

Commentary: Dig-darśinī-ṭīkā with Bhāvānuvāda

(By Śrīla Sanātana Gosvāmī himself including a deep purport of that commentary)

Śrī Gopa-kumāra says, “It was surprising that even while residing in the Nanda-kānana garden, profuse with pārijāta flowers and other heavenly delights, I still could not forget my stay in Śrī Vṛndāvana, where I experienced much greater pleasure in tending the cows.” This verse beginning with atyajam aptly conveys this idea. He says, “I neither gave up chanting my mantra nor did I ever forget the land of Vraja. This was because the more I chanted Śrī Madana-gopāla-deva’s mantra, the more His playful activities appeared as sudden visions (sphūrtis) in my heart. Since the chanting of this mantra by its nature increases attachment for the Lord’s pastimes, my affection for Vṛndāvana began to blossom more and more.

“Upon achieving perfection through sādhana (regulated practice), there is no need to continue one’s practices. By the power of my sādhana, Śrī Madana-gopāla gave me the fruit of His mantra–vision of Śrī Upendra Bhagavān. Even then, I could not give up chanting my mantra, whose mercy had made my life successful. To do so would have made me guilty of gross ingratitude toward that which had given me the perfection of my desires. This concern compelled me to continue my mantra-japa.”