The Bhikkhus Rules
A Guide for Laypeople
by Bhikkhu Ariyesako | 1998 | 50,970 words
The Theravadin Buddhist Monk's Rules compiled and explained by: Bhikkhu Ariyesako Discipline is for the sake of restraint, restraint for the sake of freedom from remorse, freedom from remorse for the sake of joy, joy for the sake of rapture, rapture for the sake of tranquillity, tranquillity for the sake of pleasure, pleasure for the sake of conce...
Talking Privately
The previous rules dealt with physical proximity whereas this next rule concerns a bhikkhu and woman talking alone. It might appear strange that a rule should completely forbid confidential interviews with a bhikkhu alone. Yet if one reflects on how things have regularly gone wrong with such private spiritual counselling, it is easier to see that being safe is better than sorry for the sake of everyone involved. Even if their conduct is completely pure, it still may lead to rumour and criticism.[1]
The seventh Confession offence arose when Ven. Udaayin went to visit lay supporters. He sat close to the mother of the family at the front door, teaching her Dhamma in a quiet, confidential manner, and then approached the daughter in law who was by the side door and spoke to her in the same way. Both women mistakenly thought that he was flirting with the other, and criticized him, saying that Dhamma should be given in a clear and open way. As a result the Buddha eventually laid down that:
"Teaching more than six sentences [vaacaa] of Dhamma to a woman, except in response to a question, is [an offence of Confession] unless a knowledgeable man is present."
(Summarized Paac. 7; BMC p.285)
There are different interpretations as to exactly what is meant by six sentences, for the Paali word vaacaa can mean word, saying or speech.[2] Even if there are many women, but no other man, it is still considered an offence.
One can see from the origin of this rule that the point (again) is not that women cannot be taught Dhamma but that it should be done in a way that is completely open and above misinterpretation.
Footnotes and references:
[1]:
"A monk counselling a female disciple alone invites excessive intimacy and encourages rumour. If one is to speak more than a few sentences to a woman, one should always try to call another monk, novice or layman to come within hearing." (AB)
Perhaps intimate and private telephone conversations should now also be included here. Some communities require that another monk be privy to what is going on, whether phone conversations or (over familiarity) in letter writing:
"This guideline would also apply to telephone conversations but not to written communication, although careful reflection (and perhaps another bhikkhus guidance) should be exercised." (HS ch.13)
[2]:
"The Explanation to this guideline defines Dhamma very literally as what is spoken by the Buddha, his disciples, seers or celestial beings, connected with the goal, connected with Dhamma. It is thus technically no fault to speak to a woman in more than six sentences about any other topic, although suspicion may be aroused. Presumably, any conversation between a conscientious bhikkhu and a spiritually aspiring woman would be only about Dhamma, various kinds of worldly topics were regarded as animal talk and unworthy of a true samana." (HS ch.13)